One of the biggest struggles I face as a mom is my little girl's addiction to video games. It takes a lot of effort to get her majesty to take a break once she gets started. Slowly, however, we are making small gains. The other struggle I face is much sneakier and far more pervasive. I am referring to our family's love hate relationship with sugar. Video games have the benefit of being contained in a console or hand held. Sugar,the evil ninja bastard, hides in Doritos, ranch dressing, peanut butter, and the usual suspects we encounter every day.
We are fortunate, as a family, that diabetes is not an issue. I am a big proponent of moderation but that's not easy to keep things down to a dull roar when your opponent is ubiquitous. My spouse is also in the process of losing weight. Diet sodas and artificial sweeteners are creeping into my kitchen. Normally, I'll take all the help I can get but when it comes to those "packets" I'm not a believer in better living through chemistry. I have no idea what the long term impact of that crap is on the human body so oddly enough, diet cherry Pepsi is an occasional treat and for all I know, we consume too much of that.
I happen to know they make this magical stuff called water that's cheap, good for you and doesn't stain if you spill it. How do you lead by example when you can't stand plain water yourself? You resort to soda, and by "soda" , I mean seltzer. We use the stuff to cut fruit juice and make powdered drinks. It is by no means a perfect solution but it helps. I haven't tried making fruit water for everyone yet. My gym bottle has crushed lime and ginger in it, maybe I should consider a larger volume? I also find myself reading a lot of labels. Some granola bars can be just as bad as Pop Tarts. Yay marketing!
Marketing, I believe, is also responsible for recruiting both other parents and my daughter's friends. Did you know the grade school lunch table is actually a minefield with uncomfortable seating? My daughter may see it as more like Wall Street, Oreos are worth way more than Apple slices on the trading floor. I have talked to her about what goes on and have been increasingly dismayed at what other people are sending their kids to school with for lunch. I'm guessing that since I have the luxury of being a stay at home mom, I can pack more healthy things. Adhd or not, my game plan is to get her more involved in packing her own lunch. So fellow parents, how goes the sugar fight at your house?
Tuesday, January 22, 2019
Wednesday, January 9, 2019
Superman misplaced his cape
I am listening to my husband hunting for a job and reminding myself to keep my big beak out of it. He is a bit older and quite a talker. My suspicion is that the unemployment is getting to him. There is no shortage of work to do around our house and I would love to see some of these things get fixed before we decide to move. The house should look good for us, too, not just prospective buyers.
My problem is keeping my trap shut when he's on the phone with job prospects. I have mentioned how it's a different job hunt now than it was even five years ago. It's a struggle to watch from the sidelines when you think a loved one is under valued. What is he actually worth on today's job market? My belief that it's nowhere close to what I feel he should get, of course. There is such a thing as a "grey tax" which for me means that if you get the job at all, you will not be paid what you're worth. Why is experience valued so little? I'm sure he's still adjusting to this "new routine" and I don't expect him to be home for too long, but what if I'm wrong?
Back in the ancient days when I was looking and dealing with those used car salesmen of the employment world, a new resume on line would attract headhunters like throwing chum in the water. Nowadays, he's chasing after them. Not only is there no such thing as a have-a-nice-life postcard, you don't even get the decency of an acknowledgement in most cases. The cover letter is also becoming passe. We dinosaurs are having trouble keeping up this short attention span world!
We are seven weeks in, as of this writing, and my spouse is redefining antsy. I am more than happy to keep him busy, hey I'm here to help. That mulch out front was only about three years overdue, not that anyone noticed. We could even do something crazy like play hookie for a day. I'm wondering if either one of us would remember how.
It would be wise to have some shred of a long term plan (while we're going nuts here) just in case this unemployment thing goes way longer than we think. I may end up going back to school sooner rather than later. My daughter's advice was to find something you like and you're good at, but who would pay me to eat chocolate?
My problem is keeping my trap shut when he's on the phone with job prospects. I have mentioned how it's a different job hunt now than it was even five years ago. It's a struggle to watch from the sidelines when you think a loved one is under valued. What is he actually worth on today's job market? My belief that it's nowhere close to what I feel he should get, of course. There is such a thing as a "grey tax" which for me means that if you get the job at all, you will not be paid what you're worth. Why is experience valued so little? I'm sure he's still adjusting to this "new routine" and I don't expect him to be home for too long, but what if I'm wrong?
Back in the ancient days when I was looking and dealing with those used car salesmen of the employment world, a new resume on line would attract headhunters like throwing chum in the water. Nowadays, he's chasing after them. Not only is there no such thing as a have-a-nice-life postcard, you don't even get the decency of an acknowledgement in most cases. The cover letter is also becoming passe. We dinosaurs are having trouble keeping up this short attention span world!
We are seven weeks in, as of this writing, and my spouse is redefining antsy. I am more than happy to keep him busy, hey I'm here to help. That mulch out front was only about three years overdue, not that anyone noticed. We could even do something crazy like play hookie for a day. I'm wondering if either one of us would remember how.
It would be wise to have some shred of a long term plan (while we're going nuts here) just in case this unemployment thing goes way longer than we think. I may end up going back to school sooner rather than later. My daughter's advice was to find something you like and you're good at, but who would pay me to eat chocolate?
Friday, December 28, 2018
Moo ha ha , tee hee
I have been told that people think I'm funny. Thankfully, only one was my mother. I have been trying to figure out what to do with this alleged "gift". This has been going on for a while, me floundering in mid life, that is. The humor thing has been going on since I was a kid. I loved mad libs in grade school and watched Mel Brooks movies as I got older. My father was probably the biggest smart-ass I knew. We kid's grew up with dear old Dad singing "Happy birthday to you, you escaped from the zoo, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one, too". I swear I thought that was how it was sung until around age 8.
A steady diet of Bugs Bunny was also part of the program, although I think that was as much because the owner of the television was a fan as anything. I recently turned 50 and whenever I think about bitching about that fact too much, his words come back to me. "It could be worse, you could have a kid your age. " I read a joke that says what doesn't kill you gives you unhealthy coping mechanisms and a warped sense of humor. Throw in a family history of depression and I think you've got a recipe for sarcasm. I should also point out that not only are we Polish people Not a slender race, we have no filters.
My experiences as a kid were largely observational. It's also funny to think that as a Catholic family, my parents may have taken the old fashioned marriage vow that mentioned to "love, honor, and obey". My mother was 19 when she got married and claims that she didn't speak English at the time and so didn't understand what was going on. If my father expected any form of "obey" out of my mother, he was quickly disabused of that notion. I watched my parents function as best they could with little money and an unhappy marriage but we kids were of the seen and seldom herd variety.
My own offspring has the luxury of being heard and she's inherited our family's capacity for humor and sarcasm. We've had a friend who warned us "the tape recorder is always on" you need to be careful about what you say around your kid. It surprises me how she manages to use what she hears appropriately. I can remember playing Candyland with her at age 4. Typically, I was not one to play any game aggressively with her but I also don't let her win. This particular time, she was winning until she selected a card that sent her back to start. She looked at her card and said "I got totally hosed!". It came back to haunt me early, and it hasn't stopped yet.
A steady diet of Bugs Bunny was also part of the program, although I think that was as much because the owner of the television was a fan as anything. I recently turned 50 and whenever I think about bitching about that fact too much, his words come back to me. "It could be worse, you could have a kid your age. " I read a joke that says what doesn't kill you gives you unhealthy coping mechanisms and a warped sense of humor. Throw in a family history of depression and I think you've got a recipe for sarcasm. I should also point out that not only are we Polish people Not a slender race, we have no filters.
My experiences as a kid were largely observational. It's also funny to think that as a Catholic family, my parents may have taken the old fashioned marriage vow that mentioned to "love, honor, and obey". My mother was 19 when she got married and claims that she didn't speak English at the time and so didn't understand what was going on. If my father expected any form of "obey" out of my mother, he was quickly disabused of that notion. I watched my parents function as best they could with little money and an unhappy marriage but we kids were of the seen and seldom herd variety.
My own offspring has the luxury of being heard and she's inherited our family's capacity for humor and sarcasm. We've had a friend who warned us "the tape recorder is always on" you need to be careful about what you say around your kid. It surprises me how she manages to use what she hears appropriately. I can remember playing Candyland with her at age 4. Typically, I was not one to play any game aggressively with her but I also don't let her win. This particular time, she was winning until she selected a card that sent her back to start. She looked at her card and said "I got totally hosed!". It came back to haunt me early, and it hasn't stopped yet.
Monday, December 17, 2018
The big 5 oy!
It finally happened. I recently had THAT birthday. In the weeks leading up to it the question was to party or not to party. Truthfully, I felt funny asking my husband to throw a big bash when he is currently unemployed. We decided on a small gathering of some good friends at a nice diner. It wasn't easy since it was Father's Day weekend. The day I was born, my mother told me they had to call the doctor away from his family. I've been hearing "Couldn't you just get me a tie?", ever since. I was happy and grateful to see our friends were able to be there. They even ordered me a birthday cake, no gag candles included.
I also received a wonderful wine basket from one friend and a pretty glass to drink it in from someone else.
You could say though, (warning - mush alert!) the best gift I got was the reminder of family. Years ago I learned that you really can't define family by biology. People just don't live long enough or behave well enough for that. When I looked around the diner table, I felt slightly less scared of my own mortality or maybe just plain loved. The fun problem of turning my age is that cosmic reminder that "you could be next!" as the supply of older relatives dwindle. Oh well, I figured we had a nice dinner with a few good friends and that was enough. I had no idea I was wrong.
The following week was spent preparing for vacation at the beach. My daughter finished school and I spent that week cleaning, packing, getting teacher thank yous together, and wrapping my brain around the idea that I am seriously fifty. Going away is like small scale version of the holidays. There's a lot of anticipation and work and then it flies by and you feel let down when it's all over.
We were blessed with another great week at the beach and the worst thing we had to handle was a sunburn. The drive home was largely uneventful except for the GPS taking us off a wrong exit and we pulled into our driveway tired, loaded down and slightly carsick. Our garage doors hadn't been working for weeks so I thought nothing of it when I had to get out of the car to let us into our garage. As we pulled in though, I was wondering if there was something big or weird in our garage, although I Couldn't imagine what.
During the vacation, we had talked to my mom who had said something odd. She asked my husband where his car keys were and said our friend Cindy needed his car out of our garage. Normal, intelligent humans would have put two and two together at that point but no, some of us are still sharp as a bowling ball. I asked my husband why my mom would ask such a thing and he said,"I have no idea why she said that, maybe she's just tired" - and I BOUGHT THAT! Dear reader, if you ever throw a surprise party for someone, choose an extremely dense victim and all will be well. That did have me scratching my head but rather than act on the impulse to investigate, for some reason, I just went back to my jigsaw puzzle.
Later, on the trip home, my husband took the wrong exit and damn near had a cow! What's even funnier is that I flat out said "I'm not late for anything", not knowing I was dead wrong! Since our garage doors had not been working for weeks, it wasn't remotely odd when I had to get out to go in to hit the button for my side of the door. What was odd was seeing my mother's car on our street. I thought "She's watering our plants today??", but we're home now. See previous paragraph about dense victims.
Not only was my house packed with people whose cars I did not see, the place was decorated, too! Surprise was an understatement! My girlfriend had great decorations that said Vintage Vixen on them and best of all, the biggest container of sangria I'd ever seen. If you have to get older I Couldn't have asked for better company to do it with, but next birthday, I think I'll go a little easier on the sangria.
You could say though, (warning - mush alert!) the best gift I got was the reminder of family. Years ago I learned that you really can't define family by biology. People just don't live long enough or behave well enough for that. When I looked around the diner table, I felt slightly less scared of my own mortality or maybe just plain loved. The fun problem of turning my age is that cosmic reminder that "you could be next!" as the supply of older relatives dwindle. Oh well, I figured we had a nice dinner with a few good friends and that was enough. I had no idea I was wrong.
The following week was spent preparing for vacation at the beach. My daughter finished school and I spent that week cleaning, packing, getting teacher thank yous together, and wrapping my brain around the idea that I am seriously fifty. Going away is like small scale version of the holidays. There's a lot of anticipation and work and then it flies by and you feel let down when it's all over.
We were blessed with another great week at the beach and the worst thing we had to handle was a sunburn. The drive home was largely uneventful except for the GPS taking us off a wrong exit and we pulled into our driveway tired, loaded down and slightly carsick. Our garage doors hadn't been working for weeks so I thought nothing of it when I had to get out of the car to let us into our garage. As we pulled in though, I was wondering if there was something big or weird in our garage, although I Couldn't imagine what.
During the vacation, we had talked to my mom who had said something odd. She asked my husband where his car keys were and said our friend Cindy needed his car out of our garage. Normal, intelligent humans would have put two and two together at that point but no, some of us are still sharp as a bowling ball. I asked my husband why my mom would ask such a thing and he said,"I have no idea why she said that, maybe she's just tired" - and I BOUGHT THAT! Dear reader, if you ever throw a surprise party for someone, choose an extremely dense victim and all will be well. That did have me scratching my head but rather than act on the impulse to investigate, for some reason, I just went back to my jigsaw puzzle.
Later, on the trip home, my husband took the wrong exit and damn near had a cow! What's even funnier is that I flat out said "I'm not late for anything", not knowing I was dead wrong! Since our garage doors had not been working for weeks, it wasn't remotely odd when I had to get out to go in to hit the button for my side of the door. What was odd was seeing my mother's car on our street. I thought "She's watering our plants today??", but we're home now. See previous paragraph about dense victims.
Not only was my house packed with people whose cars I did not see, the place was decorated, too! Surprise was an understatement! My girlfriend had great decorations that said Vintage Vixen on them and best of all, the biggest container of sangria I'd ever seen. If you have to get older I Couldn't have asked for better company to do it with, but next birthday, I think I'll go a little easier on the sangria.
Wednesday, December 5, 2018
The big change
This is the first summer in who knows how many presidents that my husband and I are both home. This is also the summer that yours truly hits the big 5-OH (crap!). I certainly don't feel like I'm that old. What's interesting about it is that my spouse seems to have launched a one man campaign to be extra nice to me. I think he's trying to cushion the blow. My father was famous for saying it could be worse, you could have a kid your age. Believe me, there's no comeback for that one. I've tried. We got to run an errand together without offspring and I got a brief flashback of life before child.
It's like getting a smartphone, you get pretty spoiled pretty quickly. We are also lucky that we can afford a Summer camp this year so that even though school is out, hopefully we can still have some grown up time together before he finds another job. Having the spouse home is also letting me get to accomplish more without worrying about getting home in time to pick up her majesty on time. We have sort of been living like roommates for the last several years, which was really bugging me. After almost sixteen years of marriage, I'm glad to have the chance to remember why the hell we got married in the first place.
I have mentioned previously that I try to never stop a man from voluntarily cleaning anything. The same holds true for repairs. While I am enjoying my spouse's unemployment mostly, I can't help but wonder if it isn't starting to get to him. It's been a little over two weeks since his job ended and he has more than kept himself busy, and not just obsessively job hunting. Good for him!, and you're correct. It is good for him. I just didn't understand how necessary it was for him to keep busy. Truthfully, I expected him to get depressed and veg out for a while. Instead he seems to be pressuring himself to get a plethora of things done in a day. Is it possible to miss stress?!
My guess is the lack of routine is very disconcerting. We are all of us creatures of habit, after all. When you've been doing the same thing for over ten years and then suddenly you're not, it can feel like hitting a brick wall, even when you know it's coming. It occurred to me that even though I'm unemployed I do have my own general routines that, in a sense, feel like a job. It could be that this huge shake up will be good for us all. I hope to get my husband back, our daughter will see more of her dad whether she likes it or not and maybe, just maybe, we will actually find time to enjoy life. Let's not get nuts!
It's like getting a smartphone, you get pretty spoiled pretty quickly. We are also lucky that we can afford a Summer camp this year so that even though school is out, hopefully we can still have some grown up time together before he finds another job. Having the spouse home is also letting me get to accomplish more without worrying about getting home in time to pick up her majesty on time. We have sort of been living like roommates for the last several years, which was really bugging me. After almost sixteen years of marriage, I'm glad to have the chance to remember why the hell we got married in the first place.
I have mentioned previously that I try to never stop a man from voluntarily cleaning anything. The same holds true for repairs. While I am enjoying my spouse's unemployment mostly, I can't help but wonder if it isn't starting to get to him. It's been a little over two weeks since his job ended and he has more than kept himself busy, and not just obsessively job hunting. Good for him!, and you're correct. It is good for him. I just didn't understand how necessary it was for him to keep busy. Truthfully, I expected him to get depressed and veg out for a while. Instead he seems to be pressuring himself to get a plethora of things done in a day. Is it possible to miss stress?!
My guess is the lack of routine is very disconcerting. We are all of us creatures of habit, after all. When you've been doing the same thing for over ten years and then suddenly you're not, it can feel like hitting a brick wall, even when you know it's coming. It occurred to me that even though I'm unemployed I do have my own general routines that, in a sense, feel like a job. It could be that this huge shake up will be good for us all. I hope to get my husband back, our daughter will see more of her dad whether she likes it or not and maybe, just maybe, we will actually find time to enjoy life. Let's not get nuts!
Monday, November 26, 2018
Attack of the Happy Holidaze?!
It is that magical time of year again! Fall is in the air and retailers are knee deep in their pumpkin spice peppermint money grab. Holiday music before Halloween makes me want to stick a broomstick in my eye. I understand why rich people disappear to a tropical island for the winter. What's a nonlottery winner to do? (Personally, I think if I could market some Merry Hallothankmas cards I'd fix that money issue, but I digress.) I could pretend I'm in the tropics but I don't think the dirt on my kitchen floor would pass for sand and it's too cold for flip flops.
One disaster at a time is the mantra at my house, despite the fact that it feels like I'm pushing back a wall of pudding. Tempus, the bastard, keeps "fugiting" and faster than I can sneeze, Halloween is in my rearview. Should I have started trying to enjoy fall in September? It's hard to think of falling leaves when you're still wearing shorts. By the time the weather started to feel like I should consider some apple cider, egg nog hit the store shelves! How did I manage to miss the fall? Since there's no use crying over spilled cider (certainly cider without a shot of Apple whiskey, but there I go again) my best bet is to focus on what's in front of me before I miss that, too.
The bonus advantage to trying to stay in the present not thinking about the dreaded Holiday aftermath that tends to hit me like a freight train in January. My solution to this is to create cheap excuses to get people together without the decorations or cards. I admit this is still a struggle for me. Things go easier when you plan ahead, don't they? Maybe I could find a pilgrim hat that would fit my Easter Bunny statue, but I think I'd be better off eating my pumpkin pie slowly. Duck! Here comes another one!
Happy Holidays to all, every friggin' one (holiday, that is)!
One disaster at a time is the mantra at my house, despite the fact that it feels like I'm pushing back a wall of pudding. Tempus, the bastard, keeps "fugiting" and faster than I can sneeze, Halloween is in my rearview. Should I have started trying to enjoy fall in September? It's hard to think of falling leaves when you're still wearing shorts. By the time the weather started to feel like I should consider some apple cider, egg nog hit the store shelves! How did I manage to miss the fall? Since there's no use crying over spilled cider (certainly cider without a shot of Apple whiskey, but there I go again) my best bet is to focus on what's in front of me before I miss that, too.
The bonus advantage to trying to stay in the present not thinking about the dreaded Holiday aftermath that tends to hit me like a freight train in January. My solution to this is to create cheap excuses to get people together without the decorations or cards. I admit this is still a struggle for me. Things go easier when you plan ahead, don't they? Maybe I could find a pilgrim hat that would fit my Easter Bunny statue, but I think I'd be better off eating my pumpkin pie slowly. Duck! Here comes another one!
Happy Holidays to all, every friggin' one (holiday, that is)!
Friday, November 9, 2018
Are we done yet?
Welcome to early November. It's Halloween again! We have made the mistake of having our television on. Every four seconds, it seems, there's another commercial on for some candidate we're sick of hearing about. Even my oblivious ten year old daughter has noticed that all these commercials ever seem say is, "The other guy's a fart face, vote for me." I'm also beginning to think the networks must think we're senile or two and a half, because of the endless repetition. If there was a network out there that would boycott political ads from mid October until after the election, I think they'd make a mint.
I am once again, like everyone else, forced to hold my nose and select the least amount of evil I can find. This was the first midterm election I voted on in years. I normally did not care but it seems the insanity in Washington was too much for even me to handle. I prefer my craziness to skew more toward the middle if possible. Fortunately, it turns out that the rest of the country felt the same way and people were voting in droves. I guess this was a somewhat hopeful sign that my fellow citizens still give a rat's ass. It also must be pretty bad for people to put their remotes down long enough to vote, too.
Where would we get information about candidates if we don't have commercials? If I could indulge in a fantasy here, I would schedule debates. Since we live in a short attention span world, I'd also keep them short, like 15 minutes in a series of three. I'd like to see if these clowns could string an intelligent sentence together. It would also help to see if they were smart enough to understand how to best make use of your time to make a point. Regrettably, that still doesn't seem to stop some scary creatures from getting elected but I figure hope springs eternal.
Once the election is over, of course, you have the ad nauseam analysis by various pundits. This year is even worse, in my humble opinion, due to the incessant delusional crowing by the commander in chief. I have done my best to avoid the major networks once I've heard the weather. We get our televisions back by mid November but it leaves me wondering about the rest of the year. Why does it seem that elected officials disappear once elected? Don't all employees get performance reviews during the year? Why not these guys?
I am once again, like everyone else, forced to hold my nose and select the least amount of evil I can find. This was the first midterm election I voted on in years. I normally did not care but it seems the insanity in Washington was too much for even me to handle. I prefer my craziness to skew more toward the middle if possible. Fortunately, it turns out that the rest of the country felt the same way and people were voting in droves. I guess this was a somewhat hopeful sign that my fellow citizens still give a rat's ass. It also must be pretty bad for people to put their remotes down long enough to vote, too.
Where would we get information about candidates if we don't have commercials? If I could indulge in a fantasy here, I would schedule debates. Since we live in a short attention span world, I'd also keep them short, like 15 minutes in a series of three. I'd like to see if these clowns could string an intelligent sentence together. It would also help to see if they were smart enough to understand how to best make use of your time to make a point. Regrettably, that still doesn't seem to stop some scary creatures from getting elected but I figure hope springs eternal.
Once the election is over, of course, you have the ad nauseam analysis by various pundits. This year is even worse, in my humble opinion, due to the incessant delusional crowing by the commander in chief. I have done my best to avoid the major networks once I've heard the weather. We get our televisions back by mid November but it leaves me wondering about the rest of the year. Why does it seem that elected officials disappear once elected? Don't all employees get performance reviews during the year? Why not these guys?
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