Wednesday, February 14, 2018

My bestie?

   Recently my daughter has been watching the movie "Captain Underpants." It's a great film, too. We really enjoy the music from it. It's a story about two best friends who pull pranks at school. Unfortunately, this got me thinking. Do I have a best friend? I used to when I was growing up. I also had another good friend in my singles group days. My daughter has one good friend in the neighborhood here. Currently though, I can't say that I have a friend I hang out with on a regular basis.
   There is one friend in "our circle" who comes close. We have a lot of fun together and she is incredibly easy to talk to, and drink with. She used to babysit our daughter and she does our yard sale with me every Spring.  I think the problem for me seems to be making time to make friends and trying to keep up the friendships I have. (All one or two of them!)
   I have a lot of small commitments during the week that take up time during the day. The problem is that before I know it, the day is gone. It's making the time for a text, or God forbid, a phone call, that seems to be my biggest issue. What's funny is, that my daughter took a game off of her tablet that I had been playing. I was disappointed at first, but now I realize that she did me a favor.  Those little games are great, but they can really eat some time. It's true what they say about writing things down. If you ever want to know where your time is going, try keeping a diary for a day or two.
The same is true for calories, but that's a whole separate discussion!
   It is true that when you have a family, your friends change. You seem to start hanging out with the parents of your kid's friends or other parents. It's clearly easier to relate and certainly easier to coordinate schedules. Best friends, or close friends, however, can be a bit different, I think. Individual outings can also be a lot tougher to manage, too.
   This brings me to the issue of parental guilt. You have a lot of nerve scheduling something that does not involve your child, don't you? My issue seems to be remembering that if you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anyone else, right? Nonsense, Superwoman can do anything! I should be able to do it all, shouldn't I? I really need to stop "shoulding" on myself. Why does it feel like being a full time mom doesn't entitle one to breaks that last longer than a cheesecake commercial?
   Not getting paid doesn't mean that I don't have a job. Funny thing is, it's an accepted fact that being a full time parent is the most important job you can have. The problem is that I need to be the one to accept it. This is no small task. It means valuing myself and my time. Where's my cape and phone booth? I would settle for a microscope to find the value I'm placing on myself.
   I have an opening for a friend and possible drinking buddy, any takers?

Thursday, February 8, 2018

Fnar b qs and other gatherings

   As of this writing it is about a week or so after the Superbowl and amazingly the Philadelphia Eagles were in it and won! We, as a family were lucky enough to have friends over to watch the game. I am far from a rabid football fan. I'm a fan of people bringing food to my house and cleaning up. Mostly I enjoy the commercials like everyone else and the cheap excuse to get our friends together and get the house in order.
   We also have a blast at these little events. You know you've had a great evening when you've been laughing so hard your stomach hurts at least once. It also gives us a chance to use the games that would otherwise collect dust in our basement. I am hopeful that eventually we can get the kids to put the devices down long enough to actually join us. I know, I've always been a dreamer.
   Another upside for me is the leftovers. Since we have a habit of making enough food to feed Zimbabwe when we having more than two people coming, I am guaranteed to not have to worry about dinner for the next few days. The downside is the plethora of junk food that comes to the house. Thankfully, once a month is just about enough for me to keep up my mood and not ruin my waistline completely.
   These gatherings for me are also a huge help in fighting the winter blahs. February,  March, and April were never my favorite months. Granted that is mostly because of tax season but also because I seem to be someone who needs something fun on my horizon, even if I have to put it there myself.  It's also a lucky thing for me that we have great friends willing to travel to our house.
   This is assuming, generally, that people aren't sick and the roads are passable. This year, oddly enough, the weather hasn't been too bad in terms of snow. While our neighborhood looks great snow covered, the white stuff was much more fun when I couldn't drive. It also never seems to be enough. My feeling is either bury me in the house for a few days or leave me the hell alone. Despite this year's flumageddon, we have escaped so far, largely unscathed.
  Basically, we sit around, eat, drink, and make fun of each other. Sometimes we even fit a game in. It's usually cards of some form. So, dear reader, how do you fight the winter blahs?