After what felt like weeks but was really only days so far on Facebook I've finally decided to get political but only here if I can. First, I am glad it's over. The political ads made Halloween seem like a prelude to Easter. The presidential campaigns were bad enough. We were also subjected to the local ones, not even in our state, just to add to the nauseum. I was really concerned about the effect they'd have on our daughter but they were repeated so much that she started to tune them out. Still, it was really getting old for all of us.
I had no clear idea what I was going to do when I got into that voting booth. It was a lot like a martial arts test. I try not to think about it until it's on top of me. For most elections, I end up voting for the person who seems the least evil. What do you do when you're faced with a tie? I was used to holding my nose on election day, but full on hazmat suits?! I've left my screaming pumpkin on my porch in honor of the results.
I admit it was also hard to ignore the commercials for us grownups, too. Hillary's commercials were the worst and best ones. They were the most effective in that the most negative shots at her opponent were nothing more than clips of him speaking like an ass. The bad part for me was hearing more venom than policy. Trump's commercials were God awful because they were full of pie in the sky promises with next to zero clue how to get there.
I cannot understand how in a country of millions of human beings, these two bozos were the best we could come up with?!?! I wanted a woman president, for obvious reasons. I am one, I'm raising one, and men have been screwing this up for so long, why not try a woman? My problem was that it shouldn't have been That woman. If she had any class, she would have resigned or offered to resign after the Benghazi disaster and who knows, maybe if that had happened, Americans would have forgiven and forgotten by now.
When the big day finally came, I found a way out. I voted, but I couldn't bring myself to vote for either one and the alternatives were underwhelming, too. Fortunately, I found a third option, you were able to type in someone! I typed in the name of Alan West, no not the guy who played Batman. He's a political commentator, of sorts. (Google him.) It was an emotional choice, I know. Many people said 'You wasted your vote', I get the logic but I went the emotional route.
Like most other white people, or rather, not enough of us, I was surprised at the outcome of the election. More than that, I found myself in a real funk for a few days afterward.
I also couldn't watch the concession speech and definitely not the victory speech. The concept of our nation putting that thing in office was bad enough, I couldn't hack hearing it speak any more than necessary. Beside the whole shitty attitude toward women thing the other thing that bothered me about what we elected was the I-love-me attitude that was so overt it could be seen from space. If Hillary had the same attitude, she at least hid it better. Did I mention I left my screaming pumpkin on my porch in honor of the election results?
Facebook has been depressing mostly because I'm watching friends argue back and forth over who they voted for. I read one really good post that said basically I'm disgusted at people who voted for Trump because they were supporting his attitudes (racism is ok, it's ok to treat women like shit, we don't care if you make fun of handicapped people etc.). What I'm wondering is whether that's really true. How many of my friends chose to ignore Trump's behavior because they would rather have put Daffy Duck in the White House over Hillary? That's understandable.
The problem I have with the protestors is that I see them as a bit misguided. Our election was legal according to the laws we currently have. What the protestors should direct their energy to is to change the electoral college law. From what I understand Hillary won the popular vote and she would have won had the law been different, but it's not. We're stuck with who won, legally.
My mother I think, had the smartest take on the whole thing. She said 'I hope he surrounds himself with smart people and listens to them.' I'm hoping that, too. None of my friends would treat women like shit or make fun of handicapped people. I wish they had voted for None of The Above but that guy was too smart to want the job. My friends are still da bomb, no matter who they voted for. I just hope they agree to disagree, even if it's for four years.
Thursday, November 17, 2016
Sunday, November 6, 2016
What's a holiday?
I would like to take an informal poll. What constitutes a holiday for you? Most would say family. I am, or at least partially, with that crowd. Thanksgiving is well on its way and hence the annual decision is upon us. Since our family is not only small but largely older, we don't seem to have a consistent tradition when it comes to Turkey Day. This holiday, as a kid, was always spent at my grandmother's house. Now that many people have passed away and I have a family, I am down to my Mother and the inlaws to consider.
It's frustrating that I'm the only one who feels this way. I get the feeling that my inlaws consider us as an afterthought. We are informed of what his family is doing for holidays after the decision is made. I guess because I'm the last one to join the family and most of them are older it makes sense. My problem is their choices. They are restaurant people. Maybe someday I'll get there but I'm not there now. I have no interest in making someone else cook a huge dinner for my benefit, I get it, it's a lot of work.
Here's where the question of environment versus the company comes in, Am I wrong to feel like Thanksgiving is not a holiday when you're at a restaurant. For some reason every year we go out with his family, I feel like I'm missing out. On the other hand, I don't want my husband to not see his family on a major holiday. Our house, while not completely far away from everyone, is also not centrally located. Although in previous years, they have selected restaurants close to our house. ( I don't think they've had much of my cooking so how could they deem it inedible??)
It could be that the grass is always greener. Would it feel better if some people came here for dinner? A lot of the people I grew up with are gone. There's something about walking into a house and smelling a turkey that's irreplaceable for me. I understand the appeal of taking the easy way out and when you work full time, the prospect of having company and all that entails is especially daunting. This is all the more reason to have people over our house, at least this year. I'm a stay at home mom. I have the luxury of a little more time and energy.
It's frustrating that I'm the only one who feels this way. I get the feeling that my inlaws consider us as an afterthought. We are informed of what his family is doing for holidays after the decision is made. I guess because I'm the last one to join the family and most of them are older it makes sense. My problem is their choices. They are restaurant people. Maybe someday I'll get there but I'm not there now. I have no interest in making someone else cook a huge dinner for my benefit, I get it, it's a lot of work.
Here's where the question of environment versus the company comes in, Am I wrong to feel like Thanksgiving is not a holiday when you're at a restaurant. For some reason every year we go out with his family, I feel like I'm missing out. On the other hand, I don't want my husband to not see his family on a major holiday. Our house, while not completely far away from everyone, is also not centrally located. Although in previous years, they have selected restaurants close to our house. ( I don't think they've had much of my cooking so how could they deem it inedible??)
It could be that the grass is always greener. Would it feel better if some people came here for dinner? A lot of the people I grew up with are gone. There's something about walking into a house and smelling a turkey that's irreplaceable for me. I understand the appeal of taking the easy way out and when you work full time, the prospect of having company and all that entails is especially daunting. This is all the more reason to have people over our house, at least this year. I'm a stay at home mom. I have the luxury of a little more time and energy.
We also have the miracle of supermarkets. If I asked everyone to bring maybe a side dish or dessert, doesn't that make things easier and certainly cheaper than a whole restaurant dinner? I admit I have another motive. I get to use a turkey out of my freezer and not have to deal with a stupid amount of leftovers. We are a family of three without company so a huge turkey is not something I would normally consider.
For some reason, I don't mind Christmas with the in-laws, mainly because it's at someone's house. Still, I am still trying to figure out how to start our own tradition even if it is just us three. It would be nice to have people over that day, too but let's not get greedy. I may have to settle for Christmas Eve at some point. We still have one tradition left from my youth. There has always been a fish dinner and Mass with my mother. Currently, we gather what's left of my side of the family and my mother prepares the Polish fish recipes I grew up with.
That tradition may change locations but it will never be a restaurant.
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Happy-ish Anniversary
Recently, my spouse and I have hit the 14 year mark. It’s hard to believe, of course. I don’t feel 48 and I’m lucky enough to be told I don’t look it, either. We’ve hit that Jesus-Christ-it’s-you-again point in our marriage. I’d like to say that we’re still as frisky as ever but mostly we just want a nap. Our beautiful daughter is 8, funny, smart and full of energy. Did I mention mommy and daddy want a nap? I’ve asked my spouse if he’s sorry we’ve only got one child. “I’m in my 50’s, I’m exhausted!” Our next child will have four legs and a tail.
I get it that I’m lucky to be able to stay home and raise our daughter, it’s just that there are days when I want to run away from home. There are a few downsides if I do that. I’d have to make my own coffee for one. (We live by the biblical rule he-brews.) I’m also not sure who’d end up getting custody. I don’t mean my daughter, I mean that currently, we are the party house and our friends would have to choose. I don’t get any holidays. Our family is small and my in laws are older and prefer to go to restaurants for holidays. I am way not fond of this. Thanksgiving at a restaurant is not a holiday.
I’ve gotten so desperate I made up my own holiday. I call it Friendsgiving. It gives me the chance to make a turkey for more than 3 people and it’s a cheap excuse to get everyone together to drink too much and bulls**t all evening. I also get to use my free-for-$400 turkey we get every year and we get turkey leftovers. We’ve also been doing this for a while now so my guests literally make themselves at home and help clean up my kitchen! Who wants to louse that up?
I’m glad I only have two children. I gave birth to one, the other one bought me flowers for our anniversary. Our problem is that “date nights” are few and far between. We get out by ourselves once a year whether we need to or not. By the time we get done paying for a sitter, dinner, drinks (God forbid), dessert and a movie if we really get crazy, we’ve spent a stiff chunk of change. It’s no wonder we don’t get out much more than that.
As if we weren’t short enough on time, I’ve been “Highly Encouraging” (harassing the s**t out of) my spouse to start getting in shape. No, round is a shape, but not a good for your health shape. It has recently dawned on me that I need him to stay as healthy as possible for as long as possible. I admit I have ulterior motives. I cannot even think about the possibility of raising a teenager by myself. It would also be nice to someday enjoy retirement with a healthy person as opposed to taking care of someone chronically ill. Accountants make lousy nurses and I have zero bedside manner.
The spouse and I get along well enough. The biggest reason I married the man (besides my best friend telling me to) was that I became convinced we were joined at the brain. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve said “I demand a foil hat!”, I’d be driving a much nicer car. The compatibility thing was overwhelming since the beginning. We’ve read a lot of the same books, he knows how I react to things, we say the same thing at the same time a lot, and can finish my sentences. It’s nauseating and creepy at the same time. I tried to mentally calculate what the odds are of me finding anyone else I have this much in common with, yeah, I guess I’m committed - or I ought to be.
Friday, October 14, 2016
Mom's new car and the disappointed dinosaur
I was recently dragged kicking and screaming into the world of new cars and even worse, car dealers. My mom just bought a new to her Rav 4 small fuv. I admit I liked the new car smell and the cockpit. I was bummed out to discover that the newer cars do not come equipped with cd players anymore. Don't ask me why I was surprised. I think it was also a bit annoying to have my old age thrown up in my face like that. It makes sense now that I think about it. Of course there's a store in my areas selling cd's for $1, everyone else is buying their music in a digital format, except for us old fartasaurs.
Mom asked me to come with her when she bought the car, that's the only reason I was there. Finding out how much money these people were making on the deal is about as easy as finding the holy grail. Feeling as comfortable as a guppy in a shark tank didn't help. Unfortunately for us both, my mom had decided that she was buying a car that day and they knew it. The dealer in question was someone she found on the recommendation of a friend. I am also lousy at hiding my dislike of how much they wanted from my mom for the car.
I think my mom just wanted the process to be over. Despite the shingles, mom had been to several dealers with friends test driving cars before I got involved. Normally shopping is supposed to be fun isn't it? I've been in home improvement stores where I've had to send up a flare to get help (ok it just felt that way). Mom was already fed up with the whole process, or more to the point, exhausted. She made an appointment to buy a car. (This was a completely new concept for me, to be sure.) Still, I expected a better attitude from people to whom we were trying to give a pantload of money.
Dealing with car salesman is also a lot like dealing with a politician, again not helpful.
Mercifully, the best thing about this is that once we're done, we're done for a good long time. We are of the drive-it-till-the-wheels-fall-off ilk for a lot of reasons. Cheapness is probably the biggest reason along with avoiding the car buying process like the plague. It's great to have a new car, of course, but I am perfectly content to keep my old car. Old Bessie is the last car I bought from my ex before he passed away. That process was the epitome of car buying perfection. All I had to do was put the remote down long enough to write him a check. It was the equivalent of "Fetch me a new car, wench!". I bought it sight unseen from a guy who was more anal about the car being perfect than Sheldon Cooper solving an equation. I also knew I wasn't getting ripped off. I paid him cost plus a finder's fee. God, I miss him!!!
The disadvantage to a new car is the fact that the more gadgets you have, the more something can break. My car is over fifteen years old and I'm sure there are "new" nifty features that I have never used much less know how to use. Finding an honest mechanic can be like looking for a unicorn. You've heard of them but never actually seen one. It can be as much fun as sticking a fork in your eye. Someday, when I do have to get a new car, I may have to take a course to teach me how to use all the crap it comes with. Maybe I should just ger a new bike.
Mom asked me to come with her when she bought the car, that's the only reason I was there. Finding out how much money these people were making on the deal is about as easy as finding the holy grail. Feeling as comfortable as a guppy in a shark tank didn't help. Unfortunately for us both, my mom had decided that she was buying a car that day and they knew it. The dealer in question was someone she found on the recommendation of a friend. I am also lousy at hiding my dislike of how much they wanted from my mom for the car.
I think my mom just wanted the process to be over. Despite the shingles, mom had been to several dealers with friends test driving cars before I got involved. Normally shopping is supposed to be fun isn't it? I've been in home improvement stores where I've had to send up a flare to get help (ok it just felt that way). Mom was already fed up with the whole process, or more to the point, exhausted. She made an appointment to buy a car. (This was a completely new concept for me, to be sure.) Still, I expected a better attitude from people to whom we were trying to give a pantload of money.
Dealing with car salesman is also a lot like dealing with a politician, again not helpful.
Mercifully, the best thing about this is that once we're done, we're done for a good long time. We are of the drive-it-till-the-wheels-fall-off ilk for a lot of reasons. Cheapness is probably the biggest reason along with avoiding the car buying process like the plague. It's great to have a new car, of course, but I am perfectly content to keep my old car. Old Bessie is the last car I bought from my ex before he passed away. That process was the epitome of car buying perfection. All I had to do was put the remote down long enough to write him a check. It was the equivalent of "Fetch me a new car, wench!". I bought it sight unseen from a guy who was more anal about the car being perfect than Sheldon Cooper solving an equation. I also knew I wasn't getting ripped off. I paid him cost plus a finder's fee. God, I miss him!!!
The disadvantage to a new car is the fact that the more gadgets you have, the more something can break. My car is over fifteen years old and I'm sure there are "new" nifty features that I have never used much less know how to use. Finding an honest mechanic can be like looking for a unicorn. You've heard of them but never actually seen one. It can be as much fun as sticking a fork in your eye. Someday, when I do have to get a new car, I may have to take a course to teach me how to use all the crap it comes with. Maybe I should just ger a new bike.
Monday, October 3, 2016
Can we get a grip, maybe?
I am shocked again at how fast our summer has flown by. You'd think I'd be used to this by now but no, I'm still amazed. It began with the end of the school year panic about how am I going to keep our daughter occupied and ended with school starts when??!! Our girl did have a good summer. I can't say it was Facebook glamorous. There were no pictures of us checking in to this or that amusement park or getaway spot but thanks to camp, she managed a few fun trips and we made it to the beach.
Fall, will probably fly by in a sneeze. Besides the blur of homework and soccer, I have a consignment sale, a martial arts test, a birthday party, and a contest entry to handle. I also managed to commit myself to regular blogposts on a large website for promotional purposes. Changing my name to skippy would probably give me copyright issues with a major corporation so I'll settle for an unofficial nickname. I'm wondering how thin I can spread myself.
It would help me get a grip if I could manage to eat my elephant one bite at a time. Making lists help and maybe a dose of reality would aslo be nice. I will not be able to pull everything off, at least not perfectly or when I would like. Admitting that I don't have a cape and phone booth is depressing. The fun thing about having 'can't remember s**t' and lists it that you have to remember where the hell you put the damn lists. Starting things early although almost against my genetics is also helpful.
Another shocker would be to remember that life will go on. My test is not a death match where the loser gets eaten by a bear. I will do what I can to make time to write and maybe dig up some old pieces or leaf through some handwritten things to type in and post if I get stuck. Setting a reasonable word count for fall posting would help. Once our daughter starts school and soccer, I'm bound to find something funny to rant about.
Our daughter will definitely turn 8 and come hell or high water there will be an ice cream cake. The rest will come together one way or another. We already have half the gifts for her. The toughest part is telling my inlaws and our friends what her majesty would like for her birthday. This is a good problem to have, Hellllooooo, we are blessed, remember??? God forbid we should hang onto that.
Another outcome of all this stress is that I'm losing my hair. It was getting so bad I went to a dermatologist for help. I am told the leading cause is - you guessed it - stress! Stop worrying about losing your hair, it causes hair loss! I was told my hair is healthy, it's just abandoning ship. Peachy, I may have to start shopping for hats, or snarky baseball caps.
Could we not completely freak out and find patches of time to actually enjoy rather than survive?? My God, I may need an oxygen mask! Let's not go completely nuts. They say that exercise is also good stress relief. I've been having some ungodly workouts lately but for some reason the only thing I've gotten is sore. The upside of this is that I'm working off my alcohol and chocolate in advance.
Fall, will probably fly by in a sneeze. Besides the blur of homework and soccer, I have a consignment sale, a martial arts test, a birthday party, and a contest entry to handle. I also managed to commit myself to regular blogposts on a large website for promotional purposes. Changing my name to skippy would probably give me copyright issues with a major corporation so I'll settle for an unofficial nickname. I'm wondering how thin I can spread myself.
It would help me get a grip if I could manage to eat my elephant one bite at a time. Making lists help and maybe a dose of reality would aslo be nice. I will not be able to pull everything off, at least not perfectly or when I would like. Admitting that I don't have a cape and phone booth is depressing. The fun thing about having 'can't remember s**t' and lists it that you have to remember where the hell you put the damn lists. Starting things early although almost against my genetics is also helpful.
Another shocker would be to remember that life will go on. My test is not a death match where the loser gets eaten by a bear. I will do what I can to make time to write and maybe dig up some old pieces or leaf through some handwritten things to type in and post if I get stuck. Setting a reasonable word count for fall posting would help. Once our daughter starts school and soccer, I'm bound to find something funny to rant about.
Our daughter will definitely turn 8 and come hell or high water there will be an ice cream cake. The rest will come together one way or another. We already have half the gifts for her. The toughest part is telling my inlaws and our friends what her majesty would like for her birthday. This is a good problem to have, Hellllooooo, we are blessed, remember??? God forbid we should hang onto that.
Another outcome of all this stress is that I'm losing my hair. It was getting so bad I went to a dermatologist for help. I am told the leading cause is - you guessed it - stress! Stop worrying about losing your hair, it causes hair loss! I was told my hair is healthy, it's just abandoning ship. Peachy, I may have to start shopping for hats, or snarky baseball caps.
Could we not completely freak out and find patches of time to actually enjoy rather than survive?? My God, I may need an oxygen mask! Let's not go completely nuts. They say that exercise is also good stress relief. I've been having some ungodly workouts lately but for some reason the only thing I've gotten is sore. The upside of this is that I'm working off my alcohol and chocolate in advance.
Saturday, September 17, 2016
It's just another manic birthday...but does it have to be?
I can't believe it either. The timing is going to be one mad scramble. Brace yourself. Where did we put the Cuervo?? I am on the trail of arranging another birthday party. Our princess is turning 8 soon and, spoiled bunny that she is, we are having a party at a local arcade. I am less than thrilled about this but it couldn't be helped. While I never had my act together, I do try to plan ahead at least a little for our daughter's birthday.
This year mom's car accident threw me for a loop. I forgot all about planning for a party once my mom called and said she was in the hospital. Long story short, she had a bad car accident and totaled her car. It was an honest mistake, I think, but mom was pretty shaken up. It only took a week or two for the worst of the dust to settle but my focus got shifted and I just wasn't thinking about party plans. What we wanted to do, have people at our house, was no longer going to work because the entertainment we wanted to rent was no longer available.
As we say at our house, bologna happens. I now need to move forward and accept help from a party place. On the upside, I get to focus on the grown up family party - yes, there's 2 gatherings. This means a lot fewer people at my house. This is a plus since our house is too small to have people indoors so I keep everyone in our garage. The family crowd is also quite helpful since the inlaws and close friends ask 'what can we bring?'. My house also gets a good cleaning since company's coming. That's about as much fun as a fork in the eye but at least I end up with a clean house.
I also need to work getting ready for a consignment sale. I registered to sell so I need to start getting my stuff together. The problem is keeping ahead of things so I'm not behind the eight ball and killing myself to get it all done.
A friend recently asked me a great question. 'Do you have to have a birthday party for her?' This got me thinking - again. Why are we going through all this as if it was some sort of 'requirement'? I mentioned this to our girl. 'You know, I said, not everyone has birthday parties.' She looked at me as if I had asked if she wanted to be disemboweled.
Here's a biggie for the mommy to do list. How do we instill some gratitude in a daughter who is incredibly blessed? I'm guessing this is going to take baby steps, possibly billions. We struggle as it is to keep our girl from getting greedy. Unfortunately, I've seen that overstimulated look of a kid tearing through gifts, barely acknowledging one before the next one gets opened. I plan to call on the cavalry for this one. I plan to ask our family therapist for some ideas. In the meantime, I'm open to suggestions from you, dear reader.
This year mom's car accident threw me for a loop. I forgot all about planning for a party once my mom called and said she was in the hospital. Long story short, she had a bad car accident and totaled her car. It was an honest mistake, I think, but mom was pretty shaken up. It only took a week or two for the worst of the dust to settle but my focus got shifted and I just wasn't thinking about party plans. What we wanted to do, have people at our house, was no longer going to work because the entertainment we wanted to rent was no longer available.
As we say at our house, bologna happens. I now need to move forward and accept help from a party place. On the upside, I get to focus on the grown up family party - yes, there's 2 gatherings. This means a lot fewer people at my house. This is a plus since our house is too small to have people indoors so I keep everyone in our garage. The family crowd is also quite helpful since the inlaws and close friends ask 'what can we bring?'. My house also gets a good cleaning since company's coming. That's about as much fun as a fork in the eye but at least I end up with a clean house.
I also need to work getting ready for a consignment sale. I registered to sell so I need to start getting my stuff together. The problem is keeping ahead of things so I'm not behind the eight ball and killing myself to get it all done.
A friend recently asked me a great question. 'Do you have to have a birthday party for her?' This got me thinking - again. Why are we going through all this as if it was some sort of 'requirement'? I mentioned this to our girl. 'You know, I said, not everyone has birthday parties.' She looked at me as if I had asked if she wanted to be disemboweled.
Here's a biggie for the mommy to do list. How do we instill some gratitude in a daughter who is incredibly blessed? I'm guessing this is going to take baby steps, possibly billions. We struggle as it is to keep our girl from getting greedy. Unfortunately, I've seen that overstimulated look of a kid tearing through gifts, barely acknowledging one before the next one gets opened. I plan to call on the cavalry for this one. I plan to ask our family therapist for some ideas. In the meantime, I'm open to suggestions from you, dear reader.
Thursday, September 8, 2016
For the love of God, slow down!
Recently, I saw a friend post on Facebook that he saw pumpkin spice coffee at WaWa in August. I thought, 'don't worry, in ten minutes it'll be Christmas'. I think the retail after summer sling shot to the holidays is really bad for a mommy who feels overwhelmed already. For me, they're just heaping on more s**t I'm not ready for- and in a shameless money grab to boot.
I'm amazed like everyone else how fast the summer flew by. Funny to think how I was worried about how I was going to keep our girl busy all summer and now she started third grade this month! It still feels like I just brought her home from the hospital. Tempus fugit does not need any help.
I look forward to the weekend for obvious reasons but is that really such a bright idea? Most people don't have the luxury of either a job they love or independent wealth. How do you find pieces at least of your week to enjoy so you're not 'looking forward' past your whole life? I don't want my week to be something to 'kill off' at least not completely.
So how do I pull out of my personal vortex? My week blurs by in a to do list of household crap. I find this funny in the sense that I'm a stay at home mom. You'd think I'd have free time. I haven't been bored since I was 8. I would be baffled as to why the house isn't immaculate but that's a wall of pudding because of the 2 children I clean up after, ages 8 and 53. There's plenty I would like to do but it seems I don't often make it past the brussels sprouts portion of the list, at least not during the day.
Getting it all done so you won't be sorry is a big cattle prod but is it really such a bright idea? How important is this really? What's the worst that will happen if it doesn't all get done? Will something explode?
It seems odd to me that the things I journal about always end up resolving themselves. Every single time I go back through those hand written pages of worries they always turn out fine. I wish I had a grip on that fact from the beginning. If there is objective evidence that worrying is a waste of time, why do I keep doing it? I can only surmise it must be a deeply ingrained habit.
Maybe the problem is my vision. My eyes are way bigger than my stomach when it comes to all the things I want to get done. There's no way I can pull it all off, not without a cape and phone booth. Some things simply will not get done and I have trouble accepting that sometimes. It would also help me to keep my eyes on myself, too. I am not the Martha Stewart type. When I am lucky enough to come up with something creative, it's usually in response to an emergency. There will never be a birthday party with homemade perfectly decorated anything in our future.
Those close to me also know that I am notoriously late for everything. Maybe the way to get ahead is to take a step back. I'll settle for baby steps on this one since we know what a basket of sunshine I am early in the morning. I'm trying to get up a few extra minutes early to allow more time for the harassment campaign known as getting my daughter ready for school. Once during the first week of school I fell asleep and was late to go get our girl. Baby steps apparently came back to kick me in the butt.
I'm amazed like everyone else how fast the summer flew by. Funny to think how I was worried about how I was going to keep our girl busy all summer and now she started third grade this month! It still feels like I just brought her home from the hospital. Tempus fugit does not need any help.
I look forward to the weekend for obvious reasons but is that really such a bright idea? Most people don't have the luxury of either a job they love or independent wealth. How do you find pieces at least of your week to enjoy so you're not 'looking forward' past your whole life? I don't want my week to be something to 'kill off' at least not completely.
So how do I pull out of my personal vortex? My week blurs by in a to do list of household crap. I find this funny in the sense that I'm a stay at home mom. You'd think I'd have free time. I haven't been bored since I was 8. I would be baffled as to why the house isn't immaculate but that's a wall of pudding because of the 2 children I clean up after, ages 8 and 53. There's plenty I would like to do but it seems I don't often make it past the brussels sprouts portion of the list, at least not during the day.
Getting it all done so you won't be sorry is a big cattle prod but is it really such a bright idea? How important is this really? What's the worst that will happen if it doesn't all get done? Will something explode?
It seems odd to me that the things I journal about always end up resolving themselves. Every single time I go back through those hand written pages of worries they always turn out fine. I wish I had a grip on that fact from the beginning. If there is objective evidence that worrying is a waste of time, why do I keep doing it? I can only surmise it must be a deeply ingrained habit.
Maybe the problem is my vision. My eyes are way bigger than my stomach when it comes to all the things I want to get done. There's no way I can pull it all off, not without a cape and phone booth. Some things simply will not get done and I have trouble accepting that sometimes. It would also help me to keep my eyes on myself, too. I am not the Martha Stewart type. When I am lucky enough to come up with something creative, it's usually in response to an emergency. There will never be a birthday party with homemade perfectly decorated anything in our future.
Those close to me also know that I am notoriously late for everything. Maybe the way to get ahead is to take a step back. I'll settle for baby steps on this one since we know what a basket of sunshine I am early in the morning. I'm trying to get up a few extra minutes early to allow more time for the harassment campaign known as getting my daughter ready for school. Once during the first week of school I fell asleep and was late to go get our girl. Baby steps apparently came back to kick me in the butt.
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